Colleen Ballinger is back.
For the first time since posting the overwhelmingly ill-received ukulele video where she sang about how allegations that she sent sexual messages to underage fans were all part of a “toxic gossip train” full of “lies and rumors that you made up for clout,” Ballinger has uploaded a YouTube video.
It’s a return to her pre-ukulele content–lifestyle vlogs–but she does take the first three and a half minutes to address the song.
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“Obviously the last video that I posted on here was really embarrassing, to say the least,” she says, sitting on the floor of her bedroom. “I was being accused of some pretty awful things, and I was just mad, and I should have handled that situation with maturity and empathy and instead I just let my ego take over and I’m really disappointed in myself.”
She went on to admit that “over the last 15 years of my career, there have been moments where I was immature and inappropriate with some of my comedy, and there were times when I did not put enough thought into some of my fan interactions. Because of that behavior, people got hurt, and I am so sorry.”
Ballinger says that she’s spent the time since posting the ukulele video “listening and learning as much as possible, and I also needed to get the help that I needed to be okay. I’m a mom first and foremost before anything else, and I needed to take care of my kids.”
She closed the segment by saying she is “not a perfect person and there are plenty of things in my past that I wish I could go back and redo and fix and change. I don’t have control over any of that and I don’t have control over the things people say about me. I only have control over my actions moving forward. So I’m going to do everything I can to make sure I create a positive, kind, inclusive safe space online with my content.
“And if you want to be part of my journey online, I would love to have you, and if not I completely understand. I do not expect anyone to welcome me back with open arms, I don’t expect to change anyone’s mind with this video. I just wanted to come on here and say that I’m sorry and I wanted to try to show people that it’s possible for someone to grow and learn and be better after making mistakes many years ago.”
The remaining ten minutes of the video are a regular lifestyle vlog.
This video has one thing in common with the ukulele video: in neither of them does Ballinger directly address any specific allegations. She responded to some allegations before, back in 2020, but more have surfaced–many from former fan Adam McIntyre, who was 13 when he first met her–and they have all gone unaddressed.
McIntyre posted his own 27-minute response video to Ballinger’s vlog, where he theorizes that she has returned now to (a) keep the monetization active on her channel, and (b) to start bringing in revenue as holiday ads are rolling out. He also confirmed he has not received a private apology from Ballinger.
