Ke$haJust so you know, this is rant disguised as a public service announcement to all aspiring web video creators looking to squeeze the last few drops of blood from the stone that is Ke$ha’s music career. Please stop. You are polluting the internet worse than that clowns that put up Hamster Dance. Seriously, I’d rather watch Peter Coffin insist that he didn’t make up a fake girlfriend.

Ke$ha is insufferably bad, herself a parody of the vacant famewhoring of American bar rats. Sure, it’s a character, an act, but behind that is an artist insistent on exploiting our odd fascination with misguided tropes—the same maligned reason that Jersey Shore kids’ trainwreck is still going. Talent exists here no more than culinary skills exist at Taco Bell. But we still keep eating that crap. I mean this girl was discovered while serving as a backup singer for Paris Hilton. Even the punch-pulling Canadians have turned on her.

The point here isn’t Ke$ha though, that tragedy will play itself out fine on its own. My attention is focused today at College Humor, normally a bastion of web comedy, who today released a parody video of the pop singer, “We Ruin Your Bar (Ke$ha Parody),” so terrible it itself could be parodied.

On YouTube the video already has 1,361 ‘dislikes’ to just 1,761 ‘likes’, which if you’ve spent any time looking at the like ratios on videos, you’ll know this is astonishingly bad. Not quite Rebecca Black bad (2,422,191 dislikes / 331,688 likes), but bad—and getting worse.

There’s also a rare phenomenon that occurred with Ke$ha on the internet, an eclipse of the original by its derivative works. A handful of weakly talented performers, like the aforementioned Black, have been subjected to this parody eclipse, not the least of which is Ke$ha herself when the music video web series The Key of Awesome released its “TIK TOK KESHA Parody: Glitter Puke” video last February. That day, Feb 2, 2010 was unequivocally the peak of Ke$ha. And, subsequently, all further derivative works on the subject.

So shame on College Humor for acting so hastily to milk what little internet search juice this pop singer still has that they failed to even casually search for online video’s heaping body of Ke$ha parodies now stinking up the place. Henry Harrison Suplee in an 1876 engineering manual is credited as the first to coin the phrase ‘state of the art,’ and he did so with a phrase so fitting for this topic: “In the present state of the art this is all that can be done.”

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