Diesel Ass Italian clothing designer Diesel’s new Not For Running sneaker campaign features a series of tongue-in-cheek (or rather foot-in-cheek) videos covering the subject of kicking ass.

“Diesel Sneakers look great on you,” the introduction claims. “But they look much better kicking someone else’s ass.” The videos demonstrating this thesis are completely absurd.

One episode, “Countryside,” features a high speed pursuit between a shoe-car and an ass-car that culminates in a love story. “Study #7” is a slow-motion examination on how much A.W.S. (Ass Wobbling per Second) a Diesel shoe delivers. “Ballet,” a fanciful dance piece chock-full of dead-serious ass kicks. And I can’t forget my personal favorite, “Sneaker Of The Future,” a synth-heavy German language industrial (with English subtitles and 3-D anaglyphs) from the Diesel Ass Kicking Lab, which showcases an advanced ass kicking shoe equipped with claws and scissors that uploads a photo of the glorious moment to your selected social network.

So head down to the Ass-Kicking Training Center and go kick some butt.

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